Monthly Archives: October 2012

Making Space in Our Lives

Do some days feel chaotic and out-of-control, regardless of what you do? Welcome to life on earth. I have more of those days than I like to admit. What I’ve learned about those days is that we’re supposed to have them. Not all the time, but as I said – that’s life. No one is calm, peaceful and happy all the time. And we’re not meant to be.

I can’t say enough for making space in our lives. You know how good it feels to clear out some clutter in your surroundings. The same goes for your mind! We all have way too much intellectual violence going on in our heads all the time. It keeps us in turmoil and contributes to those impulsive decisions we regret almost as soon as we make them.

Here are some suggestions for how you can slow your life down & make space:
-Mindfulness exercises – looking outside at trees, flowers, nature – not judging them, but just being with them (I’ll talk more about mindfulness another day)
-Be conscious of being in the moment, rather than mindlessly going through the motions of everyday, mundane activities (washing dishes, driving to work, etc).
-Keep something you find beautiful at your desk or workspace, and stop for a moment while you’re intensely working on something to just “be”with it.
-Look at pictures of your loved ones and allow yourself to actually feel that love you have for them in your body for just a moment.
-Close your eyes JUST FOR A MOMENT and breathe deeply – trying to clear your head of any thoughts.
-Just stop working and HAVE FUN once in a while! We’re all under so much stress these days that we forget we still need that balance that a little fun provides.

You get the idea. I’m not going to tell you how to do it – that’s up to you & what works in your life. Just want to encourage you to consider finding a way to slow your life down. When you do, you’ll find that you make better decisions for yourself and you’ll have moments of that ever-elusive peace!

Serenity is not peace FROM the storm, it’s peace WITHIN the storm.

Unresolved Grief

The death of a loved one changes our lives forever, no matter who we are.  We never “get over it”, but most of us can eventually find a way to integrate the loss into our lives and move on.  Some become stuck in their grief for years, usually because of unresolved issues between them and their loved one, guilt, anger and resentments, unanswered questions or missed conversations.

I’d like to make you aware of a grief treatment that dramatically decreases the grief many experience.  Guided Afterlife Connections (GAC) is a new, cutting-edge therapy in which I’ve been trained.  This single, extended session (typically 4-6 hours) achieves a release of grief, replaced with peace and joy.  The session opens a portal to the other side. Grief, anger and feelings of emptiness are dissolved or greatly diminished.  The thought of this may sound unbelievable, but it is possible.  This treatment can eliminate multiple therapy sessions to work through grief.

The websites or will give more information.

If you or someone you know is experiencing grief or still having difficulty with the loss of a love one after more than a year, I will be happy to answer questions.  For session availability, please call my office at 816-510-1172 or email me at



What I’ve Learned

Like many of you, there is someone in my life that challenges me in just about every way possible. That person is someone I love very much. I’ve spent lots of energy trying to understand, help this person, and at times, to realign my side of the relationship so that it feels better to me.

The realization I’ve finally come to is that this person has been and continues to be my greatest teacher. I now believe that we are joined together in a spiritual path through which both of us are meant to learn.

Here are some of the things I’ve learned (and often am even able to practice :)) so far:

-To enjoy the moment. Yesterday may have sucked and so may tomorrow, so when it’s good, I relish in it. Even if today is the one that sucks, I’m learning to appreciate the lesson and the fact that if nothing else, it will propel me upward eventually.
-To love unconditionally, with no strings attached, is the only true love. Anything other form is either obsession or some other form of self indulgence.
-To allow the other to live their life in their way, even though it feels very wrong or unsafe to me.
-To want the peace that I want for myself even more for the other person.
-To send that person love every day (at LEAST once a day) – and those days when I’m not feeling the love to ask God to make me an instrument of the loving energy that comes from the Universe.
-I’ve learned and practiced a meditation where you breathe in the pain of another and breathe out the healing energy of Love.
-To honor the other’s perspective on life and understand that we each see our environment through the lense of our own experiences in life. Based on that person’s belief system, I can respect their choices.
-I can’t hurt enough for the other person to make them better. All that does is double the amount of hurt – It doesn’t help the other, and it certainly doesn’t help me.

Finally, in order to do ANY of the above, I have to allow space in my life to let something new in.  If I keep myself obsessively busy trying to understand it, control it, fix it, or just continuously feeling the other person’s pain, I will never have the space in my life to allow anything else to come in.  Peace, true understanding or love will not be able to squeeze in.  And I will  have drained myself dry of any energy I had to be of help if and when the opportunity comes.

I’m not saying I can practice all of this all the time. Life isn’t all or nothing, and sometimes, even though we learn, it takes several reminders before it becomes a part of us. But each time I get pulled back down, a new light eventually comes on and I’m that much further ahead than I was before.

No One is Like You

I like to give credit to my sources, but I have no idea where this came from, who wrote it or when. However, in honor of National Coming Out Day (October 11), it feels appropriate, so I’m sending it out to all my friends, regardless of who they are, how they look, or what their sexual orientation is.


Think what a remarkable, unduplicatable, and miraculous thing it is to be you. Of all the peope who have come and gone on the earth, since the beginning of time, not one of them is like YOU!

No one who has ever lived or is to come has had your combination of abilities, talents, appearance, friends, acquaintances, burdens, sorrows, opportunities. No one’s hair grows exactly the same way yours does. No one’s fingerprints are like yours. No one has the same combination of secret inside jokes and family expressions that you know. The few peope who laugh at all the same things you do don’t sneeze the way you do.

No one is loved by the same combination of peope that love you. . . NO ONE!

No one before, no one to come. You are absolutely unique. Enjoy that uniqueness. You do not have to pretend in order to seem more like someone else. You weren’t meant to be like someone else. You do not have to lie to conceal the parts of you that are not like what you see in anyone else. You were meant to be different. Nowhere ever in all of history will the same things be going on in anyone’s mind, soul and spirit as are going on in yours now.

If you did not exist there would be a hole in creation, a gap in history, something missing from the plan for human kind. Treasure your uniqueness. It is a gift given only to you. Enjoy it! Share that uniqueness.

No one can reach out to others in the same way that you can.

No one can speak your words. No one can convey your meanigs. No one can comfort with your kind of comfort. No one can bring your kind of understanding to another person.

No one can be cheerful and lighthearted and joyous in your way.

No one can smile your smile.

No one else can bring the whole unique impact of you to another human being.

Update on New Grief Therapy Training

I have completed my first day of training here in Seattle, where I connected with my deceased mother – it was a 6 hour session, but so relaxing and amazing.  I came away with such insight, love, energy and commitment.

Preparing for my second and final day of training.  Can’t wait to share this with everyone!