This is one of those posts that I repeat every few months – partly because I receive feedback that it helps others, and partly because I need to remind myself of these lessons. I also change and add to it each time, because I keep learning my lessons!
Like many of you, there is someone in my life that challenges me in just about every way possible. That person is someone I love very much. I’ve spent lots of energy trying to understand, help this person, and at times, to realign my side of the relationship so that it feels better to me.
The realization I’ve finally come to is that this person has been and continues to be my greatest teacher. I now believe that we are joined together in a spiritual path through which both of us are meant to learn.
Here are some of the things I’ve learned (and often am even able to practice :)) so far:
-To enjoy the moment. Yesterday may have sucked and so may tomorrow, so when it’s good, I relish in it. Even if today is the one that sucks, I’m learning to appreciate the lesson and the fact that if nothing else, it will propel me upward eventually.
-To love unconditionally, with no strings attached, is the only true love. Anything other form is either obsession or some other form of self indulgence.
-To allow the other to live their life in their way, even though it feels very wrong or unsafe to me.
-To want the peace that I want for myself even more for the other person.
-To send that person love every day (at LEAST once a day) – and those days when I’m not feeling the love to ask God to make me an instrument of the loving energy that comes from the Universe.
-I’ve learned and practiced a meditation where you breathe in the pain of another and breathe out the healing energy of Love. -We don’t have to be in each others lives every day. Sometimes the best we can do is love them from a distance.
-To honor the others perspective on life and understand that we each see our environment through the lense of our own experiences in life. Based on that person’s belief system, I can respect their choices.
-I can’t hurt enough for the other person to make them better. All that does is double the amount of hurt. It doesn’t help the other, and it certainly doesn’t help me.
In order to do ANY of the above, I have to allow space in my life to let something new in. If I keep myself obsessively busy trying to understand it, control it, fix it or worry about it the only thing I’ll be successful at is numbing myself. Any of these behaviors will keep me from having the space in my life to allow anything else to come in. Peace, true understanding or love will not be able to squeeze in. And I will have drained myself dry of any energy I had to be of help if and when the opportunity comes.
I’m not saying I can practice all of this all the time. Life isn’t all or nothing, and sometimes, even though we learn, it takes several reminders before it becomes a part of us. But each time I get pulled back down, a new light eventually comes on and I’m that much further ahead than I was before.
SANAYA SAYS: Donning Your Cape
“Oh, but I don’t want him or her there!” you cry, and this is understandable if that one’s energy is so very dissonant to yours. If you are unable to see from your soul’s perspective, you will spend your time together focusing on how your two vibrations grate against each other. Ah, there’s the rub. That other is in your life for a purpose. If they rub you the wrong way, there is growth to be had. Can you be in their presence long enough to ask your higher self why the discord? Yes, you can choose not to include another in your activities, but when you can include them and find peace, then you have turned what would have before been an unpleasant situation into a triumph of the spirit.
How to survive a clashing of vibrations? Be like Superman. Put on your spirit cape and your giant “S” and rise above the clatter. Do you recall how humble Superman was? He did not go about telling the world that he was the caped crusader, and we recommend you do the same. Quietly shift to your greater role and see why that other acts as they do. Now muster all the compassion in your heart and silently send it their way from that giant “S” on your chest. Suddenly it will not matter who is in the room, for your love will have changed the whole dynamic. You have saved the day for your lower self. Isn’t it powerful to be a superhero?
– Sanaya (a collective consciousness channeled by Suzanne Giesemann)