Monthly Archives: July 2014

Acceptance – and Allowing

Those who have spent any time in a 12 Step program usually get a relatively good understanding of the term “acceptance” from the get go. It’s crucial to give us a goal – a place to which we aspire, whether or not we can practice it on a consistent basis.

I have always understood that acceptance means I can accept the hand that is dealt. It doesn’t imply that I have to like it. But if I can accept, my path is a little easier – and definitely a LOT simpler.

However, I know many (myself included at times) who tend to accept begrudgingly.

When I started on a more serious study of my spiritual beliefs, I came across the concept of “allowing.” Just saying it give me a sense of relief.

To me, allowing means I don’t have to fight it at all. I just have to recognize things are as they are – possibly as they are meant to be – who knows? I just feel so much peace when I remind myself to allow.

I don’t mean any disrespect to those who feel they must fight something in their path. I understand that it gives them a sense of personal power and a motivation to get past something. However, I think sometimes the mindset is “If I don’t fight it, I am giving in or giving up.” I don’t believe it has to be all or nothing.

For example, I have had some health issues this year that have, at times, knocked me on my butt! I’ve never had this experience, as I’ve always been very healthy and physically strong and have prided myself in eating well most of the time, working out and meditating to care for myself in all areas.

I can’t say I have always accepted my illness. And I still slip back into fighting it from time to time. But I’m slowly learning something.

(Before I go further, I want you to know that I understand what I’m about to say may sound kind of “woo woo” to some of you. I get it, but it’s working for me so far).

I’m learning that if I allow my illness to be what it is without stressing about it, that I can see it with love. I fully believe that if there is a purpose to life here on earth, it is primarily to connect with others and to learn to truly love myself. Since I believe we are all One and

    part of a larger entity (God, Source, Universe . . .), those are two aspects of the same thing.

    When I can see my illness as as part of myself that has simply recently shown up, I can welcome it lovingly. I believe it’s here to teach me something, and I might as well get about learning the lesson, so I can move on. That’s not giving in to it. I’m even more motivated to take care of myself – and to love myself more. I’m using traditional medicine to a small extent, but I’m being more proactive in pursuing alternative treatments that focus on my energy and love of my Source and Self.

    In the midst of all of this, I use a lot of loving self-talk – and gratitude toward my illness, thanking it for being present and allowing me this opportunity to learn.

Relationships

Relationships are our greatest spiritual teachers. They provide us with the best opportunities to grow and evolve as spiritual beings.

Of course, it’s the difficult relationships that teach the most. I’ve heard it said that our true soul mates are those that cause us the most grief. Often those are the people we’re closest to – or who we WANT to be closer to – a parent who has always been distant or abusive, a child who is defiant and constantly keeps us questioning our sanity, or a boss who has his/her own issues that are taken out on us.

I can honestly say that the most difficult relationships in my life have been the door to increased spiritual satisfaction and peace m- eventually.

The opportunity knocks from the outside, but that door only opens from the inside. We have to be conscious of the lesson and willing to do what it takes to learn it.

Seeing the Wonder of the World

We’ve had our 5  year old granddaughter for 3 years now. While she can be a hand full at times, it’s so much fun to see her perspective of the world – the excitement of petting a dog, collecting all the rocks from Papa’s garden, or showing us how far she can swim under water with a joy that she just can’t contain.

As adults, we seem to lose that fascination with everything around us. Especially in our culture, where we have so much stimulation all the time, we need more and more to give us any sense of enjoyment. In fact, many of us have so much that we become bored with life and what it has to offer.

Rumi, a 13th Century poet said: “Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment.” To me this means that we need to lose the feeling of entitlement we sometimes have and get back to that sense of excitement and awe of the magnificence that we call life on earth. When I’m able to do this, I feel such an awareness and gratitude that I know I’m aligned with my higher power.